~ JOURNEY from MOURNING to JOY ~
WEEK 4
DAY 1
Freedom from condemnation
In the Bible
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9
In the Bible
Then maidens will dance and be glad, young men and old as well. I will turn their mourning into gladness;I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow. Jeremiah 31:13
In the Bible
Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep [die], or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. 1 Thessalonians 4:13
In the Bible
All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3:16–17 NASB
DAY 5In the Bible
Come, let us bow down in worship, let us kneel before the LORD our Maker. Psalm 95:6
For the 2 QUESTIONS from "In the Bible" and "In your life" applications, please refer to the "Help for the Journey" study.
(main resource for this 6 wk. study)
along with the Bible and my personal experience
Day 1
ReplyDeleteFreedom from condemnation
In the Bible
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9
1. If you fail, does God condemn you?
2. When you sin as a Christian, what should you do?
3. Do you believe you are “in Christ Jesus”? If you are not sure, review The Foundation for Healing material on the GriefShare website.
In your life
1. Do you feel that you are forgiven? Why or why not?
2. Do you feel guilty?* Does that feeling keep returning? What is its source?
* People who have not experienced the death of a loved one do not truly understand the feelings of guilt you may be experiencing (regardless of whether the guilt is false). At a GriefShare group you can learn about God’s offer of freedom, forgiveness and love.
1. If you fail, does God condemn you? No, thank God!
ReplyDelete2. When you sin as a Christian, what should you do? Confess, admit, repent, reconcile, rejoice
3. Do you believe you are “in Christ Jesus”? Yes, most definitely.
I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me (Galatians 2:20).
1. Do you feel that you are forgiven? Why or why not?
Yes, but it took years to forgive myself. I am forgiven as far as the east is from the west, as soon as I confess my faults.
2. Do you feel guilty?* Does that feeling keep returning? What is its source?
At times, I feel guilty over the suicide death of my friend and that i could of/should of/would have done something to have prevented this. On each Sunday, at the hour of his suicide, often I deal with this guilt and what ifs... and many of the other emotions like anger, sadness, loneliness,... that is when this feeling returns. The source (unknown) could be the enemy knowing my weak places, where I am vulnerable and hurt...
Mourning:Loss of a Child (Guilt)
Dealing with Guilt
How to Let Go of Past Guilt
I read this and maybe it may help you, too with
ReplyDeleteGuilt
"Guilt is the hidden fuel to anger. When you see wood burning stronger than it should, suspect gasoline; when you seen anger burning stronger than it should, suspect guilt.
Why does guilt fuel anger? It is horrible to feel guilty. If you just start to feel the flickering of guilt, it is natural and human for you to do whatever you can to avoid that feeling of guilt. Fortunately, there is a way to try to make that guilt go away. Unfortunately, it's called blaming your partner. Blaming your partner doesn't work well in any situation, so it's a stupid thing to do. And it's wrong to blame your partner just so that you don't feel guilty. But guilt doesn't feel good, and blaming is a natural temptation for anyone. Unfortunately, blaming your partner is the same thing as thinking your partner is wrong, and that turns frustration into anger.
So, suppose you feel a flickering of guilt. You absolutely need to acknowledge it. Acknowledging guilt is painful, because it turns that flickering of guilt into a real feeling of guilt. But if you don't acknowledge it, you can't manage it. Instead, it will control you. If you are angry, look for sources of guilt that could be fueling your anger.
Second, you need to provisionally accept your guilt. For now, you are just noting that, right or wrong, you feel guilty. You are not saying that you deserve to feel guilty.You are a human. Humans feel guilty. Sometimes they deserve to feel guilty, and sometimes they feel guilty when they shouldn't. Again, the worst thing you can do at this point is start defending yourself, because that is going to lead to attacking your partner.
The third step is identifying the sources of your guilt. It is usually not difficult to find the sources of guilt. As far as I know, guilt will not ride with you in the car to the bridge game, and there usually is only one source of guilt.
Reducing Guilt
I cannot help you if you really should feel guilty. Suffering is still better than trying to blame other people.
But should you feel guilty? Your partner always has two acceptable excuses -- "I was doing what I thought was right" and "I made a mistake." You should allow your partner these excuses, because they are fair and appropriate. For the very same reasons, you should allow yourself these excuses. This is your recipe for not feeling guilty. You were doing your best. If you made a mistake, you were not trying to make a mistake, mistakes just happen.
When you make a big mistake, forgive yourself, confess to partner, and go on to the next...
Conclusion
So, you are a human being. When these emotions occur, acknowledge them. Don't start feeling frustrated, angry, or guilty because you have these emotions. Accept that you are human, and it is natural to have these emotions. But that doesn't mean they are right. Find out the source of your emotions, then consider if the emotion is correct. Should you really be frustrated? Or can you rethink the situation as probabilistic? Should you really be angry? See your partner as doing what he/she thought was right? Should you really feel guilty? You try not to make mistakes, but they happen.
Now imagine this. You make a mistake. You apologize to partner. Partner says, "That's okay, no problem. Mistakes happen." Find that partner. Be that partner. "
Love this, Peggy, and your SOS post too.
ReplyDeleteInteresting line in your comment above. Guilt fuels anger. So very very true. It also feeds addiction. Guilt feeds addiction. That is why the accusor is always working so hard even through God's children. Sadly, I hear more of it from the pulpit at times than anywhere else.
Thank you for stopping by. I'm glad the morning doves blessed you. Between my mug and my hanging basket, the message was clear, huh. ;)
I love stopping by your page. I SO wish I could stop by more often but my computer is getting old and it slows down with certian pages, yours being one. I had to stop visiting my blogging friend, Bernice, too. Know that I am often tempted to click over more often than I do.
Enjoy your day my sis.
In the Bible
ReplyDeleteTherefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9
1. If you fail, does God condemn you?
No, not if you're a believer. But, the Holy Spirit will convict us of sin. And I am grateful for that. Because conviction leads to confession, and confession leads to repentance. Sin will not keep the believer out of Heaven (we are not condemned), but unconfessed sin will keep us away from communion with the Lord - it will compromise our relationship with Him.
2. When you sin as a Christian, what should you do?
As I said above. We should go to the Lord in prayer, and confess our sin. We should tell Him how sorry we are, and thank Him for the forgiveness He gave us on the cross. We must ask Him for the power to turn away from sin, and to follow Him more closely. Then, if our sin has involved anyone else, we should pray for God's wisdom in what we need to do to restore our relationship with that person.
3. Do you believe you are “in Christ Jesus”? If you are not sure, review The Foundation for Healing material on the GriefShare website.
Oh, praise God, yes! I am sure.
In your life
1. Do you feel that you are forgiven? Why or why not?
It's an interesting thing you bring up here. Forgiveness cannot be based on our feelings. Here's what I mean. Sometimes I haven't felt forgiven - because sin has ramifications, consequences that continue even after we've confessed our sin to the Lord. However, His forgiveness is not based on how we feel. His forgiveness is an accomplished FACT. It is based on the Truth of the cross. So, after I've been forgiven by the Lord, holding on to guilt can sometimes be a tool of the enemy.
2. Do you feel guilty?* Does that feeling keep returning? What is its source?
As I said above, guilty is a feeling. It is different than conviction. Conviction works toward restoring a person to the Lord. Guilt seems to do the opposite - making us avoid the Lord. In that way, guilt is a powerful tool of the enemy to keep us discouraged, powerless, ineffective - guilt paralyzes, conviction moves us to action, to reconciliation.
GOD BLESS you, dear amiga - thinking of you today (and every day!)
Hi Peggy -
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for listing those scriptures. In particular today Romans 8:1 ministered to me.
Your work shall be rewarded, Peggy.
2 Chronicles 15:7 - KJV
Thanks for sharing those beautiful verses, Peggy. Love you ~
ReplyDeleteDay 2
ReplyDeleteA transformed sorrow
In the Bible
Then maidens will dance and be glad, young men and old as well.
I will turn their mourning into gladness; I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow.
Jeremiah 31:13
1. It may seem like your sorrow will last forever. How does this verse suggest something else?
2. What is God’s final goal for you?
In your life
1. How has your compassion grown through your suffering and grief?
2. How have you become more aware of the feelings of others?
Day 3
An invincible hope
In the Bible
Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep [die], or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. 1 Thessalonians 4:13
1. What kind of difference is there when you have hope during your grieving?
2. What does a Christian have to be hopeful about?
In your life
1. If you knew with certainty that you would see your loved one again someday, how would that change your grieving?
2. What are your hopes and dreams attached to?
3. If you are a Christian, how does your grief differ from people you know who aren’t Christians?*
* For more information about what it means to let God lead your life and to learn what there is to be hopeful about, visit The Foundation for Healing
Day 4
The greatest book in the world
In the Bible
All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3:16–17 NASB
1. How can you be equipped by God?
2. What are the different uses of the Scriptures (God’s words in the Bible)?
In your life
1. How do you use Scripture in your life?
2. How has Scripture corrected or encouraged you?
3. Make a plan for studying or reading the Bible on a regular basis.
Then maidens will dance and be glad, young men and old as well.
ReplyDeleteI will turn their mourning into gladness; I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow.
Jeremiah 31:13
1. It may seem like your sorrow will last forever. How does this verse suggest something else?
That there is an end to mourning. I know that time heals, even on this old earth. And sorrow gets more "bearable" as time passes. But this verse speaks to me of another time, another life - when ALL our tears are wiped out for eternity.
2. What is God’s final goal for you?
Freedom from the influence of sin. Eternal joy in His very presence. No more sorrow, or pain, or sickness - no more tears. He will wipe every single one away.
In your life
1. How has your compassion grown through your suffering and grief?
Suffering and grief have a way of opening up a new place in your heart. It's a place of empathy and love for others. Somehow, through suffering and grief, we get a "window" into the heart of God. And we see others in a new light - everyone's hurting in some way or the other. We should be compassionate because of God's compassion for us.
2. How have you become more aware of the feelings of others?
I have always had an ability to put myself in someone else's place. My mom taught me this - and I really consider it a gift from God, too. Walk a mile in someone else's shoes - and this will enable you to feel their feelings.
GOD BLESS!
Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep [die], or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. 1 Thessalonians 4:13
ReplyDelete1. What kind of difference is there when you have hope during your grieving?
It makes all the difference in the world. It is the difference between fear and faith, despair and hope, sorrow and joy. It is the knowledge that there is more to the story.
2. What does a Christian have to be hopeful about?
An eternity in the very presence of God. A salvation that cannot be taken away. It is the sure hope that NOTHING and NO ONE can EVER separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord!
In your life
1. If you knew with certainty that you would see your loved one again someday, how would that change your grieving?
Of course, it would temper it with joy. It would comfort me with the knowledge that the "end" in this life isn't really the end. It's the end of the beginning - yes - but the beginning of the end. The start to real life in eternity.
2. What are your hopes and dreams attached to?
If they're attached to anything in this life, dreams will only end in disappointment, discouragement, and despair. Hopes and dreams have to be grounded in the Lord. If we are to soar like kites, we have to be firmly held by the Kite-Holder Himself!
3. If you are a Christian, how does your grief differ from people you know who aren’t Christians?*
I've had to say good-bye to all four of my grandparents, all in their 80's. I've had to say good-bye to my son's best friend, who was 16. All of them were believers. In the midst of all the crying, my heart held on to the sure hope of seeing them all again. That brought joy through my tears. I wasn't saying good-bye, really - I was saying "Until we meet again..."
GOD BLESS!
All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3:16–17 NASB
ReplyDelete1. How can you be equipped by God?
There are many ways to be equipped by God. First and foremost, we must be regularly reading His Word. If I want to know how to live my life, I need to read the words of the Giver of Life. I can also equip myself through reading other books by Christian authors, Bible Studies, church attendance, meeting with other believers. And of course, prayer - prayer enables the Holy Spirit to work in my life - and He is the one who gives me strength and power.
2. What are the different uses of the Scriptures (God’s words in the Bible)?
They can be used by the Holy Spirit for many things. Here are some that come to my mind:
Instruction, conviction, encouragement, comfort, guidance, knowledge, wisdom, discipline - the list could go on and on, because the Word of God is a living thing that works in the heart of me.
In your life
1. How do you use Scripture in your life?
I use it for all of the above reasons I listed. But, I'd have to say that I treasure my Bible the most because it speaks to me - through reading, I can hear God's Voice. Sometimes it's all I want to do when I'm nervous or scared or confused or sad - I just want to run to my Bible and open it up. Somehow I know it will make things better.
2. How has Scripture corrected or encouraged you?
Today (6/29) on my blog, I listed an instance when God reached out to me through His Word and gave me comfort. It happens all the time. And there are plenty of times when Scripture serves as the yardstick by which I measure my life.
3. Make a plan for studying or reading the Bible on a regular basis.
Oh, I already have - and what a treasured blessing it is to be able to study and read the Bible daily. God speaks, I listen - that is a glorious privilege.
GOD BLESS!
Day 5
ReplyDeleteWorship
In the Bible
Come, let us bow down in worship, let us kneel before the LORD our Maker. Psalm 95:6
1. What does it mean to “worship”?
2. What inspires you to worship God? (silence, songs, being out-of-doors)
In your life
1. How has music affected you during this time in your life? Which songs have been helpful to you in your healing?
2. Why is it good to worship with other people?