"The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion — to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair."~from ISAIAH 61 Bible verse for this Blog

APOLOGY to READERS who followed a SEARCH to HERE & didn't find it

On July 18, 2017, I drafted almost 3000 blog posts that I had published since 2008 when I began blogging, rather than edit each one. So if you clicked here from somewhere else and ended up with the post unavailable or error, I am sorry but this is why. It'd be too much work for me to go back and fix them. There's an explanation on 7/19/17 as I'm still learning.

Monday, December 31, 2018

BELIEVE

[I am somewhat disappointed in myself for not finishing 2018 with a summary at least of my one word choice BELIEVE so I am now writing a post on January 3rd, 2019, which I should have posted back here on December 31, 2018 at the latest and also hoped to have shared a book review before the end of the year too, but I'm still not done reading it ... and there's really no excuse so I'm sorry] These self-imposed deadlines really can mess a person up when they were hoping to start a new year with a new word and a clean slate of a grand finale of BELIEVE

Yes, I'm a little late in saying
goodbye to 2018
and
greeting 2019
with a new
One Word

I could just take the easy way out and share the beliefs in the Apostle Creed or the statement of beliefs for my denomination or even make a general overall statement that what I believe has not and did not change at all in 2018. As superficial as that might sound, it's true ... so I have to ask myself what was the reason that God put THAT one word before me as I headed into 2018. I actually BELIEVE it is/was to show me that when all the cards are down and life throws some heavy circumstances and the seasons run quickly together and pass from one to the next, by the grace of God, I held on to all I believe and those basics did not and will not change (especially if they are the foundation for my life as they are). I reviewed the devotional that I started with in 2018 and this remains:

...I believe the God of the Bible is the only true God — Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

This is the basis for all my beliefs!
{nothing is more important to me than this one}
All the rest of what I believe center on this one.

These are key to all
iBelieve
from the wonderful 365 day devotional
BELIEVE
(by Randy Frazee)

Here are some more that have not and most likely never will change:

" “I BELIEVE GOD IS INVOLVED IN AND CARES ABOUT MY DAILY LIFE.”

“I BELIEVE A PERSON COMES INTO A RIGHT RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD BY GOD’S GRACE THROUGH FAITH IN JESUS CHRIST.”

“I BELIEVE THE BIBLE IS THE WORD OF GOD AND HAS THE RIGHT TO COMMAND MY BELIEF AND ACTION.”

“I BELIEVE I AM SIGNIFICANT BECAUSE OF MY POSITION AS A CHILD OF GOD.”

“I BELIEVE THE CHURCH IS GOD’S PRIMARY WAY TO ACCOMPLISH HIS PURPOSES ON EARTH.”

 “I BELIEVE ALL PEOPLE ARE LOVED BY GOD AND NEED JESUS CHRIST AS THEIR SAVIOR.”

“I BELIEVE GOD CALLS ALL CHRISTIANS TO SHOW COMPASSION TO PEOPLE IN NEED.”

“I BELIEVE EVERYTHING I AM AND EVERYTHING I OWN BELONG TO GOD.”

“I BELIEVE THERE IS A HEAVEN AND A HELL AND THAT JESUS WILL RETURN TO JUDGE ALL PEOPLE AND TO ESTABLISH HIS ETERNAL KINGDOM.” "

I have to admit that even though I do believe all of these statements (as well as the Apostle's Creed and my denominational statement of beliefs), there are indeed days when I need to work on living out what I say I believe, but these are pivotal to my basic beliefs in Jesus Christ and a "must". Yet because I know Jesus, spend time with Him in His Word, His Holy Spirit will guide the direction of my life and purpose. It was very helpful to have the devotional to keep me on track throughout 2018... each day reading a scripture and a devotion that goes with one of those basic ten elements: God, Personal God, Salvation, The Bible, Identity in Christ, Church, Humanity, Compassion, Stewardship, Eternity. I believe that these are intertwined together in my faith and life. There are other things that I believe about other things in life however these are the ones that are central to my main beliefs - now to live my life showing that these beliefs are important!

"As Christians, what we believe— or the internal lens of our mind— impacts how we live and who we become." Randy Frazee

I will continue on this life journey of renewing my mind, heart and life until I meet Jesus. I believe in God, I believe God is good, I believe God (different than the first one) "He will do what He promises in His Word." And something new I fell upon toward the end of this 2018 journey ... God believes in me! {I never thought of that this way} God believes me. {even I have a hard time with this} yet He knows me and knows my heart with all I believe and purpose. 

One might think that after 365 days living with the one word BELIEVE as your word that you would end the year with something pretty profound and that the accumulation of all that you BELIEVE would have an impact on the one that you were hoping and believing to come to Christ (and it still is a work in progress) so "no, it did not happen, even though that loved one came so close to the brink of death and only by God and a miracle to go on, he has an extension on life so that he will come to accept Jesus as his Lord and Savior" - still waiting for this part of the miracle. I do know that God cares and loves every person enough to give them this chance to believe ... in His time. He really does not want - not one to perish (no matter how stubborn and hard hearted). I believe there is still hope and softening, much garden to till and continue planting good seeds to weed out all the other ones that need to be uprooted, and pulled out. Yet God is tender and so merciful.

Anyways most quotes that I found were "believing in yourself" and i was searching for ones that would be more inspirational and encouraging towards my intention to BELIEVE in God ... as my focus point ... so this one came the closest.

"Take a leap of faith and begin this wondrous new year by believing."

{I encountered one repeatedly that I did not like}
 which was
"You cannot believe in God until you believe in yourself."
Not too sure what I think about this statement or its truth.
I tend to think it's because I believe in God that 
I can believe in myself.


I'm not too sure that this post was worth coming back to complete
2018
but for me
it was necessary so I can move on into
2019
and
hear a new one word
to move forward
BELIEVING


what about you?

how did your One Word influence your 2018?

do you have a new One Word for 2019?

please share if you would in the comments

I have quite a few but leaning towards one that encompasses many.

God bless your 2019!!!







Sunday, December 16, 2018

CHRISTMAS ...

Makes Me Cry

... as I shared last week with "The Sweetest Gift". Then, right after I posted that song, our local Christian radio station played this one, which fits a little better. Yet somehow Christmas fills me with many mixed emotions - joyful and sad, so I especially like the part in this song on the variety of 'tears' ...



'Cuz Sometimes Christmas Makes Me Cry
and

it can be any of those 

tears

"Tears of faithfulness, tears of hope, I cry tears of joy"

{tears of thanks too}

I guess by now you can tell that I am kind of in a season of melancholy for this time of the year (but I'm not really depressed) ... In years past, on my blog, I would share songs leading up to Christmas, a countdown to Christmas with carols or some of the new songs of the season. Perhaps doing this in past years allowed me to reminisce good times and the joy of Jesus, so sharing those songs was somewhat therapeutic, as I wrote last week that music usually 'does the trick', 'brings the magic' and fills the heart with melodies that soothe and help a heart to keep rhythm with the beat of the 'rum pa pum pum' of the 'little drummer boy' or 'the night wind to the little Lamb' so you get beyond the doldrums and enter into the peace and hope that Our Savior came to bring. And you can smile as a tear drop fills the corner of your eye with a misty memory of times gone by, and the ones that touched your life, as well as those who still do. 

{sorry neither photo is very good}

Silly as it may be for some of you, I happen to be holding precious thoughts of a sweet fur baby that left us this year in August, so my tree has an ornament on top with a special silver frame holding a photo of Chiminito, then other photos of him are scattered here and there between the branches, and the twinkle of the lights (and nothing more). Chimi brought many twinkles and tinkles to my life. Yes, because in the 15 years that Chimi was here ... he touched me and he made me laugh (besides bringing 6 others into this world, 3 remaining), he was a simple, small delight of mine that God allowed in my life to teach me a few things, even about Christmas! Yes, so much in such a small friend! It's hard to imagine how something so small can make such a difference in ones' life. I even sing "Chim, chimini, chim, chimini, chim, chim, cheri ... " and "Chiminito, Chiminito, tiny little thing ... Chiminito dance, Chiminito sing, oh Chiminito, what's the difference, if you're very small, when your heart is full of love, you're ten feet tall"

So this song above, didn't make me think of Chimi, of course, but I did end up writing about him, so you can see who's in my heart this Christmas, and what happens when I sit down and simply share, those tiny pawprints made a deeper impression on me than I had thought - but without tears, just a partial smile thinking of all his many antics since he became my pup and missing him this Christmas. So you can imagine how I must feel about people that are loved ones gone, who have journeyed on from here. Some year, I will get this grieving and lamenting right, but meanwhile I'll keep holding on to the Miracles ... like the Miracle of Christmas. I sure wish others would grab hold of this Gift and realize Jesus is so much more than a 'babe in a manger' ... or a closet of 6 puppies that came into this world because of Chimi (and the stray mommy Toby), one of which who didn't know any better - my mischievious little Chimi found out the hard way and I became responsible for a few more fur babies to care for in this world, born on Day of the 3 Kings ... the Magi - and what a gift Chimi and those pups have been. The Joy of Christmas and the Magi ... Jesus brings the best gift - Himself (and so did Chimi)!

 
A Very Merry
and
Blessed
CHRISTmas
to you and yours

¡Feliz Navidad!

~Peggy, Chimi, Chiqui, Chispa and Lucky


Sunday, December 9, 2018

"The Sweetest Gift"

Somehow
music usually helps me
through difficult days and seasons

and
although this one does not fit my situations
it is very touching and new to me

so


this title helps me 
remember
that every year, every moment

JESUS
is the
Sweetest Gift
{although it's not directly what this song says}

"I'm not gonna lie
Christmas really hurts this time
'Cause you're not here to celebrate with me
Tears fill my eyes
The memories flood my mind
As I place your ornament upon our tree
Although this year I have a broken heart
It gives me hope and joy as I remember where you are
You're with the Son of God
You're with the Prince of Peace
You're with the one who's celebrating
And that thought amazes me
Sometimes I still break down
Grieving that we're apart
But the sweetest gift is knowing where you are
You're with the Son of God
for more of the lyrics, go here

because
JESUS
is the true
Reason for this
Season

every season


After this first week of December, which quite often is hard for me, pondering about what God might want for my new One Word, I couldn't help but reflect on the one for 2018: BELIEVE, because this One Word also helped me through this year as I faced times when I held closely my faith and all iBelieve. God could not have given me a more important Word than this one. Our Lord Jesus walked with me through His Word, His Promises, and alongside me all year long (even on the 2nd and the 6th, this past week), a broken heart, a broken spirit (Psalm 51:17),  a broken 'alabaster jar' (Mark 14:3-11) poured out ... what a precious gift Jesus is and gave us! The Greatest Christmas Gift! (thanks Ann Voskamp!)

JESUS

"The Sweetest Gift"
I know

... Let's Unwrap all Jesus is ... 

this Christmas, this year & next

as we wait with

expectant

hearts

for

His Coming

        Growing
In
    Faith
         Together


Life is sweeter with Jesus

holding you


Prayers for comfort and peace

[A Prayer for the Grieving at Christmas]



*I really like this video done by The Piano Guys too! Be blessed!

Thursday, December 6, 2018

"New Every Day: Navigating Alzheimer's with Grace and Compassion"

"New Every Day: Navigating Alzheimer's 
with Grace and Compassion"
by
Dave Meurer


is a light read of a very difficult subject and provides much needed information on Alzheimer's and caregiving!

I requested this book during October, which is Emotional Wellness Month, not just for someone I love who has Alzheimer's, but mostly for my own wellness while caregiving for that someone, who returned home from ICU for a stroke under Hospice Care. ('Hospice is Not a Bad Word' - great chapter and so true). Since then, my loved one has made great strides of progress in recovery, so it most certainly was timely for me, and I definitely learned much about the second part of this title 'with Grace and Compassion' from reading from Dave's wise, yet humorous perspective. I needed a bit of humor for sure after 3 months of caring under distress instead of 'navigating' well to bless the One and the person, in need of loving care when all any of my Christian fruit was wearing thin and noticeable to others, even with staying in the Word each morning and evening. I needed a break.

At first, not being familiar with this author or his style, I thought that it might be a bit inappropriate for a humorist author to write on any disease, with humor. He even addresses this in one of his chapters. As I began the book, I wondered how I could review this book favorably, not understanding the rationale or lack of order to the book until I arrived at the third chapter, entitled 'Non Chapter Note' which clarified this and Dave Meuer admitted to this inconsistency. Eventually, I began to get his humor and rationale for this approach, finding myself actually being able to laugh aloud. So my recommendation moved from low 2 star to at least a 4 star because of his heartfelt, realistic approach to sharing practical information through his own experience with his mother-in-law. Since he is somewhat directly removed, but constantly involved and concerned as part of her care team, he is able to step back and observe, giving highly beneficial information weaved between real-life stories that has helped me immensely. 

There are many chapters that I am sure I will need to go back to and read again, such as 'Medicare and Medicaid - How They Will and Won't Help' (which I'm just beginning to learn about) and 'Moving In, Moving Out and Moving On'. These are just 2 out of 30 chapters (if you count chapter 3, the non chapter). My favorite chapter, most likely because it hit home personally (though each chapter held parts that did) was 'Resentment, Fear and Other Hazards of Caregiving' however my insecurity increased slightly with my knowledge, as I looked at parts of Alzheimer's I have not yet had to face so that fear increases as you read, and then I briefly am thankful. However, I had a dear loved one that passed away this year as Alzheimer's robbed her of her gentle way and even speaking for the last few years of her life and knowing her loved ones, which I can't even imagine at this point. Dave Meurer shared with vulnerability and honesty some very difficult aspects. I have found this immensely helpful to read, learning to 'relax, adapt and especially laugh again' at a time when I was forgetting the healing that comes in laughter. 

When I set aside any of my preconceived ideas against humor in this heart breaking and horrible disease, I was able to see much value in Dave's approach and benefited (will continue to benefit) from the moments I found a laugh along this journey, from someone who knows what we face as caregivers for someone with dementia and beyond. 

Although this addresses Alzheimer's disease, I think any caregiver would benefit from reading this and perhaps if their loved one suffers from another debilitating disease, it may help more because they can step back from their own circumstance and read on a different disease, appreciating the practical, helpful guide that Dave Meurer has taken the time to write with just the right balance of humor and insights with information to help you 'navigate' resources. I also found that 'New Every Day' includes a Christian perspective, especially in the last 2 chapters ('A Life More Real Than This' and 'A Few Final Thoughts') however, it does not overdo in any way or come across preachy, he uses Scriptures appropriately and supportively; which makes this book versatile so that others will gain much from it as well.  This book has helped me in my day to day journey of caregiving of the person and myself. The chapters became easier to read with his dose of humor in such a difficult road now and in the future. I truly appreciate that he did include a chapter from his wife as well. In many ways, this book has encouraged me to look for other books written from caregivers and people dealing with Alzheimer's, more specifically from a spouse's point of view. Dave Meurer has taught me to laugh again and appreciate what's 'New Every Day' for me as a better human being caring for an Alzheimer's sufferer with more grace, compassion and understanding. 


Disclosure: I received this book free through  Revell, the publisher, in return for an honest review. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the FTCs 16 CFR, Part 255

Sunday, December 2, 2018

December 2nd & the 6th ... "You Say"

This song is in my head and on my heart for quite some time now and beckons me to share it here although it has nothing to do with this date, December 2nd nor the upcoming December 6th (which both mark the date of significant loss of a loved one) and always starts my Christmas season out with remembrance of each one, sometimes difficult, sometimes not, but never goes by without me noting a difference in the day ... sometimes it's then that I look at the date, and realize why - because these special people made a lasting imprint for years on my life, and now they're missing from my life

The one for today, especially at this season of the year, is my precious mother. It's been far too long to dwell in the pain or grief of such a loss - more than 30 yrs. but I still miss her and probably always will, this side of eternity. I tried to rationalize the reason for this song with anything with either of these people and I come up with nothing like ... it's because they taught me this or made me feel like this ... just anything at all that deals with a connection ... and there's none to these significant people, but it's very much connected to My One Word for 2018. In fact, I'd like to say, it's become my theme song for this One Word (and in case you've forgotten what my One Word is - it's repeated often, perhaps the most) ... so, see if you can pick it out or remember as you listen or read the lyrics of Lauren Daigle's "You Say":

"I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I’m not enough
Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up
Am I more than just the sum of every high and every low?
Remind me once again just who I am, because I need to know (ooh oh)
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe (I), oh I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe
The only thing that matters now is everything You think of me
In You I find my worth, in You I find my identity, (ooh oh)
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe (I), oh I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
Oh, I believe
Taking all I have and now I'm laying it at Your feet
You have every failure God, and You'll have every victory, (ooh oh)
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe (I), oh I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe
Oh I believe (I), yes I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
Oh I believe (oh) "


So, it would have made more sense to write a tribute to my mother or have a song that reminds me of her or a favorite of hers, but truthfully, I cannot think of one, nor did I share a relationship with my mother that was close or affirming, like I've seen with other mother-daughter relationships. I think this is mostly because I recall so much of our time together with her being 'not well'. She suffered quite a lot and so letting her go at the age of 65 seemed to be the best for her and a blessing. Yet as I now approach that age (next year), I can better understand and I'm not suffering of any chronic illness or on as many medications as she took plus needing an oxygen tank daily must have been so debilatating and such a cross to bear. 

[photo of my mom]

I guess the one truth I did learn was that there will be suffering in this world (John 14:27) yet we must press on as best we can. Now I try to hold on with a hopeful expectation to Revelation 21:4 and Romans 8:18. My mother, being a devout Roman Catholic, probably would not have known those verses yet believed these truths anyways and have been familiar with this message, knowing it full well in her earthly living. I truly believe that because of what I've seen in her lifetime and now mine, the basic truth found in Romans 5:3-5:

"More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us." ESV

You may be asking yourself, like I started this, wondering what's the connection between this song, your new theme song for 2018 and your mother or sharing these together with suffering?

It's basically found in what I have come to BELIEVE - and as this song speaks to me and my heart, my life, the core of lyrics that voice how I've felt for much of my life however I've been blessed to know and have a personal relationship with Jesus, that speaks truth into my being, especially when I battle or stuggle with lies. It's very difficult to rejoice in suffering or see others suffering. I may not physically suffer like my mom did, but I've known suffering as many of us do encounter along our life journey ... Yet this song reminds me of where my worth and identity lies - that I belong to God, I am His, no matter what - what God says of me, is really all that matters or counts, which has produced in me - endurance and hopefully character! Now that's the correlation of living with this hope that iBelieve which does not put me to shame because of God's love poured into my heart by the Holy Spirit through Jesus Christ. This is so tied to all iBELIEVE, not given to me by my mother, but shown to me, by the suffering I saw her go through and how that impacted me. I love my mother and know God loves me and her enough!

Every word in the song "You Say" is true to me and speaks volumes to me from God's heart to mine, encouraging me to

BELIEVE

... when ...

'I can't feel a thing'

when

'I think I am weak'

when

'I am falling short'

when

'I don't belong'
(either told or feel that I don't)

when

'I don't measure up'

when

I'm just not enough

when

I fail

when

I just need to know

what HE says of me

(not my mother, not my father, not my siblings, or my spouse)

NOT EVEN

a dear friend or church family or my past

just what

YOU SAY

LORD

i
Believe

because

I am Yours!

You

are

Enough

even when I am not





To my faithful visitors;
all of you who spend your valuable time here with me
I do appreciate you so much!

Thank you for taking your time to visit!

Love, Sweet blessings & Hugs!

DIOS TE BENDIGA
GOD BLESS YOU

always

Peggy