"NO MORE FAKING FINE"

by
Esther Fleece
{pretend you see an image of the book cover here if it's gone}
Since I heard about "No More Faking Fine ... " being released January 2017, I wanted to have it and review it. I came across Esther Fleece, through another author, book and checked out her website. I instantly knew that this book on 'lamenting' was meant for me so I signed up to get the guide from Esther Fleece before I even had a copy of her book. After reading some of the top positive reviews and a couple of the low ones, the sample copy, and this lament guide, I was convinced that this was the book God would use to bring healing in my life in 2017. 
Esther Fleece does not disappoint with "No More Faking Fine..." - I found that this deep book is one of my 2017 favorites and still working through the many ways that God is using this to walk me through healing in my life, although I have not shared experience as severe as Esther Fleece's childhood and her life journey of getting "gut-level honest with God through the life-giving language of lament" ... I have been processing through this book since I received it months ago and delayed in writing my review until I truly had a sense of this book, like no other, from beginning to end - it shatters, inspires, encourages, guides and leads the reader on a pathway to true intimacy with God, giving us permission and "voice to the hurt, frustration, and disappointment' that maybe you, like I, have "kept inside and silenced far too long." I could have put together a review of high praise when I first began this long journey of healing through this book as I shared here and there that "No More Faking Fine ..." is a MUST READ.
When I read the title, "No More Faking Fine: Ending the Pretending", my reaction was not like other reviewers that chose the book because the title captured their interest, I was sure that I certainly do not 'fake fine', in fact, I was convinced I am the complete opposite, that I tell it like it is: good, bad and ugly. However, within the last year, I noticed that perhaps I was stuffing and have not been sharing much with anyone, except God, so I wasn't "faking fine", I wasn't fine and I recalled going through periods in my life where I had done this. I found that Scripture reveals a God, as I have seen in my life, who has met me right where I am time and time again and as Esther states "not where we pretend to be". Esther Fleece walks us through her life experiences, her life story with a "suck it up" mentality, where she stuffed and stuffed her emotions. I'm quite the opposite. Esther writes with such openness and vulnerability, most of us can easily relate, even without having the same experiences, most of us have had to deal with other people when facing difficulties, hurt, grief and struggles. Esther helps us learn how to lament and biblically shows us how it's OK to express ourselves honestly when it hurts. 
There are 3 parts to Esther's book: "Faking Fine", "A New Way to Pray" and "To Sing Again" with 11 chapters. Each chapter begins with a Scripture, is filled with scriptures, and ends with a wonderful prayer!{you know how much I love prayers in books}
This is a much needed book, as Esther exposes her personal pain in a powerful way to enlighten us in the need and manner to LAMENT, to walk through our own story of difficulties honestly, authentically and just as courageously as she has and learned to do so that we may heal. I know I need this book and will continue to go through it. I highly recommend "No More Faking: Ending the Pretending" with 224 pages of truth and redemption for you and others you know that need a friend like Esther, the real deal, who understands and seemingly links arms with you as the reader through a journey of healing and lament.

Disclosure: I received this book free from BookLook Bloggers in return for an honest review. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the FTCommission’s  16 CFR, Part 255

NO MORE WOWS or ... BLOGS?

WOW! - I started out to share a Walk On Weds. (even in the rain) with some Whispers from God, but when I opened up to my "blog posts", I had a legal type notice for a blog post back in 2015, so that changed my pace and even slowed my walk, wondering about ever so many of my blog posts (all the ones before I even understood blogging and what is considered infringement on copyright, etc.) and without knowing or wanting to learn all about legalities, going back through over 3000 published blogs since 2008, I have decided to temporarily make my blog private (still a possibility), rather than take time to sift through all of this ... which in effect shuts me out of doing alot or sharing all I love to share. I could start a new blog, but maybe this is God, so I'll take this to Him first. How appropriate that my last WOW was "CHANGE"(drafted, sorry) and the title of my upcoming review of a great book.

*INSERT my UPDATE from the end moved here, so perhaps you can skip all of my deliberation to see, what I spent my Weds. doing instead of a Walk, Whisper, Word or Worship

UPDATE: As I'm working on drafting previous posts, starting with the series in question, I may be able to draft previous posts in groups of 50... so we'll see what I accomplish this way before August 1st, 2017. I am currently "drafting" all of my previous blog posts by groups of 50 and maybe at a later time, I will edit or republish those that seem to be OK.  My apologies, if you come here and it shows that post not available and I waste your click over here, if you'd like you can list that post in the comments, if you'd like it. So after working all day until almost 9 p.m., I am considering beginning again, right here as I have now drafted over 3000 blog posts (left some) August 1st may be the date I begin again (now that you've read all of this). If you find any post in those I have left that you think I should consider drafting, please let me know. I guess after almost 10 years, I am still learning about blogging or never really learned all I needed to know regarding legal matters. I am thankful to Blogger for their notification because I guess it's a way to save me from my own demise and ignorance is no excuse when it comes to legalities. Thanks to each one of you for your understanding and time with me here at aMazing Grace ~ Mazes, Messes, Miracles This certainly is one of those "messes"! I have to at least post a book review that is long overdue  (coming Sat.) end of update back to my previous thoughts or skip to the question in bold blue underlined

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Some of you receive my blog posts through emails that I know and maybe some I don't know (so "Thank you all") but without knowing who you are, I cannot send or add your name to a private list unless you let me know, of course. I already have a private blog and have not posted there for a long time.

I started "drafting" all the series for the blog post that was pointed out to me back in 2015 because it was part of a 31 Day Journey, so I want to prevent further notices, not knowing. I tried guessing and removing images that I usually give credit to them with their link, but the notice does not specify what part of the blog post was "certain content", according to what I understand from what I read. Here is how the notice starts off: (oh, and by the way, it was buried in my "updates" not in my primary ... I may have missed it altogether there)

"...Blogger has been notified, according to the terms of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA), that certain content in your blog is alleged to infringe upon the copyrights of others. As a result, we have reset the post(s) to "draft" status. (If we did not do so, we would be subject to a claim of copyright infringement, regardless of its merits. The URL(s) of the allegedly infringing post(s) may be found at the end of this message.) This means your post - and any images, links or other content - is not gone. You may edit the post to remove the offending content and republish, at which point the post in question will be visible to your readers again." ... "...You may republish the post with the offending content and/or link(s) removed."... part of the message at my blog posts

... for me, this just makes blogging too complicated

and I don't have time to re-do or un-do ...

In my mind, if you give the source, or link to who wrote it,
I thought I was not in violation
so
with this in mind
many studies, books, 31-or 40 day journeys
and
God's Whispers
all may be
in violation that I
never intend(ed)
which also means I can't review books
on a private blog, they need to be read and mine
have been shared at Amazon

and
a blog without images
just reading
my ramblings
makes
for a boring read
in my opinion

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So what is God whispering now to me this week?

(sigh)

I really wanted to share a
"Whisper of Rest"
since I missed sharing in
SOS
this past
SONday

on our final
PART 6

"SHINING as the Beloved"

where Bonnie Gray writes

beautiful

WHISPERS

Day 34 "Light" Day 35 "First Love" Day 36 "Gift" Day 37 "Poetry" Day 38 "Story" Day 39 "Song" Day 40 "Treasure"

[I don't think I finished sharing the One Word Whispers from Part 5: Daring as the Beloved, which were: Play, Known, Change, Listen, Inspired, Hope and Blossom.]
So instead of stepping up to "Dream as the Beloved", I will now be stepping back and instead of "Shining ..." I am putting my light on dimmer and dimmer ...

Looking back in light of all this, sharing all of the Whispers from LOOP and TPT and other sources, also probably are in question or could be, and far too much of my content, so it's time for me to step aside from publishing anything or linking or sharing but not due to lack of inspiration or writer's block. 
I never would have dreamed that in the month of the year that I struggle with the most for so much of my past, I'd be facing shutting down one of my key interests (hobbies) that seems to be therapeutic for me, really needed for me more than you all and to now return to private like notebooks and journals (if at all)(sigh). I'm finding in my old age (lol) that sometimes my fingers hurt as I write (arthritic stiffness) ... so even though I don't type correctly, it's easier to hit a key - maybe, back to One Note Notebook or who knows? 
I can't believe after I read the most beautiful WHISPER from Brian Simmons in my email on Monday that I don't know what God is whispering today
quit? {I don't think so}
continue? {I 'm not sure}
write my own ramblings??? (maybe)(sigh)
so many dear blogging friends have let blogging go
it's been my social outlet I have not joined all the other social media (nor will I) I don't need or want any  legal problems either
I have enough stuff in my real life <> sharing GOD and how He's speaking to me with others has been my purpose
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GOD will keep WHISPERING and shouting at us even whether we share or not whether we listen or not whether we act or not
In WHISPERS OF REST in this part I was to celebrate my calling and "be God's radiant light"
this reminds me of this part of a children's song, "hide it under a bushel, no ... I'm gonna let it shine" ... oh wait, maybe that's a violation to share the lyrics ... oh, and I have done that also so it's time to step away from blogging, lean into God's whisper and word ...
Show me, Lord
You are my Greatest Treasure
but
You shine
on Your own
in the darkness without
my help
You will shine on!
{oops, another song - is it a violation?}
[this blog will remain until public until August 1st, 2017]
I really had hopes to make it to 2018 (ten years)
let me know in the comments,
if I go private that you'd like to receive my blog posts still

"BACK TO LIFE"

{I haven't been on 'vacation' but MIA here, and I wanted to post this on Saturday, then didn't get to it, so although I'm doing it today (Mon.) I'm publishing it on Sat. because it's so where I am, and I so needed the YouVersion devotional by Mandisa and this song is a fantastic finish}
"BACK TO LIFE"

Ezekiel 37:1-10; Proverbs 18:21

If Mandisa did not write this, I should have, and it's a perfect theme for me for where I am at ... even though, it's for different reasons and circumstances, some of the lyrics still fit. This is my HOPE ... this is how I wish I felt after completing a week ago the HEALING part in "Whispers of Rest", I am far from rested or healed ... seeking more of the Master's touch, our Healer!

Mandisa

(see lyrics in video)

Although I'm not coming back  to Jesus
I'm already back  'cuz He's had my back all along And I pray He continues
I'm so thankful!
He's never left I've never left Him nor could I He truly is all I have
I'm so thankful

Coming back to life for me, is not returning to Jesus Christ, but in need of so much more of Him and Him in me, all that the Holy Spirit has ...  but we have not been separated, He's the beginning and ending of my every day; and so many of the moments in between, He rescues me, giving me the strength and hope to carry on.
In my real earthly life, my day to day existence, becomes more unbearable after returning from 20 yrs. in Mexico (although I had been back and forth almost every year for at least a month during those years when I really needed to be here and wanted to come home, I was told to stay there) then finally I was not going to wait any longer and moved the move 'back to life' {so I thought} yet life back here has literally been sucking the life out of me ...
There were many times in my life that I needed to come 'back to life' in Christ from 'prodigal' living, but as I have been living and serving Christ, I am now struggling to hold on to this earthly life as I yearn for our heavenly life. I'm so fed up with all the enemy has been dumping on me and some very close to me
I'm so tiring of fighting selfishness and sin of others and find myself reacting in the flesh far too often, which brings great sorrow to me and my spirit. My heart wants to remain tender and compassionate, however I am sensing that it may be hardening and even am fatiguing in praying for salvation to come to those who are causing me so much spiritual strife, tension, exhaustion and unnecessary problems when there are already so many to deal or cope with. This world is rapidly deteriorating and values are on decline, evil is rampant in the world in general but also in so many lives and homes ... my, how we need JESUS!!!
JESUS COME, JESUS COME {although this is not the one I was singing in my head}
JESUS I COME Elevation Worship

[On Tues. I shared a new song to me "Shoulders" but I have drafted that post, however you can hear it by visiting a new site that I love with Michelle Nezat]

SOS ~ HEALING

Study On SONday

This week I am setting aside all the studies that I shared last week, to go back to "Whispers of Rest" Book Club once again, because this week is an important section for me and my 2017 One Word: Healing ... and after my week last week, this could not have fallen into place at a better time than now ... so as much as I'd love to share P31 OBS of Jennifer Rothschild's "Me, Myself and Lies" today; and Lifeway Women's OBS by Beth Moore "Entrusted" either Mon. and/or Thurs.; and Faith/Study Gateway's OBS with Anne Graham Lotz on "The Daniel Prayer" for Fri. as I managed to do last week - God called me aside and told me, for now, this week just focus on "Healing" ... as I'm SOAKING On SONday because at this point, I have not read ahead to know all that comes in these days in Bonnie's book, but this week is:

PART FOUR

HEALING

as the

Beloved

"...Turn Brokenness into Beauty: Experience a Deeper Intimacy with Jesus"...

Jesus whispers:

" I am making all things new. I will heal your brokenness into beauty."

Isaiah 43:19
Today should be Day 21 with Bonnie but I will be doing each day a day behind here so this Monday I'll be doing day 21 then
Day 22 Tues  Day 23 Weds  Day 24 Thurs Day 25 Fri  Day 26 Sat
{so if you are actually following along with Bonnie's Facebook,  I think I will be 1 day off from what day she sends or shares in her book club and emails}
my reason is so I can do each day and contemplate  on what I may decide to share or not without thinking about publishing a post since it's about my intimacy with Jesus and healing but we'll see what happens at least I will present each day with Bonnie's Word for that day {which is all I have set up each day in draft} if they publish without anything else but that, know that I will be returning to that post and adding by that day's end
As I have written here often each of us need HEALING in one way or another
"... the wounds that once hurt you may still hold you back..." Bonnie Gray, "Whispers of Rest"
and I might add that those same wounds may resurface again because they still hurt for some reason or another we still need the HEALER who understands as we meet with Jesus this week through Bonnie's devotionals she will guide us to meet Jesus in His most vulnerable moments wit reflections that invite Him into ours to begin healing the feelings of fear, shame, rejection in the loving presence of our Healer, our Savior our precious Lord
we are not alone in whatever we face let's open our heart to JESUS
Jesus is still the Healer!

if you are blessed so much that you don't need any healing this will be an opportunity anyways to deepen your intimacy with Jesus
[image credit: bonnie gray]

I, for one, in fact, thought I was done with any healing I needed quite a while ago, yet I have found there are areas I perhaps never really healed ... but either forgot or stuffed them away so I could just go on with my life journey, then a "whisper" or worse a reminder, stirs up the pain or the wound and the need for healing to wash over you once again - God is not finished and He has His reasons and a special healing balm for you as you draw near and open up those wounds, see the scars, feel His touch, listen to His soothing whispers in His Word to you as His Beloved ... in whatever your situation, state of heart and mind, He desires you to find healing from the past, present or even future in the palm of His hand. Let us come to Him ...

FRIDAY's FAITHGATEWAY

OBS "The Daniel Prayer" by Anne Graham Lotz

... as promised ...
{my side note: actually I'm not too sure its Faith Gateway's OBS, since it's not on their website like the previous ones, under STUDIES, but is a separate link to Study Gateway (which I'm subscribed to) and this particular study, if you signed up like I did before I knew about so many being available; otherwise, it doesn't look like you can access it. Of course, these two are one in the same-kinda ... with Bible Gateway too (I think) Partners :) }
so this week was WEEK TWO
"PREPARING FOR PRAYER"

Scriptures this Week This week we are reading Matthew 6:5-18 using the steps we learned in the Bible Study Workshop (session one). Some of you may want to do these all at once, others may decide to separate them for your daily quiet time --- one per day over five days. If you don't have your copy of the study guide yet, you can also write your responses in a personal journal or notebook. Here is the individual break-down: Study 1: Matthew 6:5 (pgs 28-29 in study guide) Study 2: Matthew 6:6 (pgs 30-31) Study 3: Matthew 6:7-8 (pgs 32-33) Study 4: Matthew 6:9-13 (pgs 34-35) Study 5: Matthew 6:14-18 (pgs 36-37)

{I imagine all of this is a little late, since it'd be best to break it down throughout the week, so you take a bite and receive nourishment each day from God's Word, this Study and Prayer} Since I am more focused elsewhere ... this is how it has to be for me. 

"This week we’re learning (ed) what the Bible says about preparing for prayer. Yes, we can pray any time and any place. While running, taking the train into work, picking up kids from school, sitting in a coffee shop with a friend, washing the dishes or folding laundry at the end of a long day — these are all great times to pray. But, having a prepared place and a prepared time set aside only for Jesus is so important in order to build a solid relationship with Him… which is what we need! If we want to be powerful in prayer, first we need to know Jesus. And, in order to know Him, we need to set aside a time and a place for Him. Let’s do it this week and see what God does!"

Part One: Preparing to Pray 

(hard bound copy rather than *study guide)

1. Committed to pray
2. Compelled to pray
3. Centered in prayer

*it's the Study Guide that this Study is using that accompanies the DVDs and the book, but there is much more available in the actual book by Anne Graham Lotz, as often happens, most can't afford both. So it's Part One in the book but Session Two in the Study Guide and Session Three-Prompting in Prayer - I know I'm just confusing this.

I am and have been committed, compelled and centered!

Anne's video is a little over 17 minutes long

but packed with points

WE CAN PRAY
that

Heaven is moved and our Nation is changed

 (in my case, I need to start with my family first)

Daniel 6:10-

4 characteristics of Daniel's habit of prayer

-meet the Lord in my "prepared place" 

with all my materials gathered

-Daniel also prepared the time set aside

(he did so 3 times a day)

-create an atmosphere of reverence, respect

a prepared attitude focused on God

-cultivate an attitude of gratitude

look at our circumstances through the lens of God's love

and purpose, an attitude of worship and thanksgiving

PREPARE 

for the

Daniel Prayer

a place, a time, the atmosphere, the attitude

May I pray like Daniel:

Daniel 9: 4-19

4 I prayed to the Lord my God and confessed:

“Lord, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with those who love him and keep his commandments, 5 we have sinned and done wrong. We have been wicked and have rebelled; we have turned away from your commands and laws.6 We have not listened to your servants the prophets, who spoke in your name to our kings, our princes and our ancestors, and to all the people of the land.

7 “Lord, you are righteous, but this day we are covered with shame—the people of Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem and all Israel, both near and far, in all the countries where you have scattered us because of our unfaithfulness to you. 8 We and our kings, our princes and our ancestors are covered with shame, Lord, because we have sinned against you. 9 The Lord our God is merciful and forgiving, even though we have rebelled against him; 10 we have not obeyed the Lord our God or kept the laws he gave us through his servants the prophets. 11 All Israel has transgressed your law and turned away, refusing to obey you.

“Therefore the curses and sworn judgments written in the Law of Moses, the servant of God, have been poured out on us, because we have sinned against you. 12 You have fulfilled the words spoken against us and against our rulers by bringing on us great disaster. Under the whole heaven nothing has ever been done like what has been done to Jerusalem. 13 Just as it is written in the Law of Moses, all this disaster has come on us, yet we have not sought the favor of the Lord our God by turning from our sins and giving attention to your truth. 14 The Lord did not hesitate to bring the disaster on us, for the Lord our God is righteous in everything he does; yet we have not obeyed him.

15 “Now, Lord our God, who brought your people out of Egypt with a mighty hand and who made for yourself a name that endures to this day, we have sinned, we have done wrong.16 Lord, in keeping with all your righteous acts, turn away your anger and your wrath from Jerusalem, your city, your holy hill.Our sins and the iniquities of our ancestors have made Jerusalem and your people an object of scorn to all those around us.

17 “Now, our God, hear the prayers and petitions of your servant. For your sake, Lord, look with favor on your desolate sanctuary.18 Give ear, our God, and hear; open your eyes and see the desolation of the city that bears your Name. We do not make requests of you because we are righteous, but because of your great mercy. 19 Lord, listen! Lord, forgive! Lord, hear and act! For your sake, my God, do not delay, because your city and your people bear your Name.”

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my favorite podcast this week and prayer Focus for Friday

"Touch the Sky"

great devotional on Prayer via this song

from another new site "More Than a Song" I found and love

"BELOVED"

is the most current

perfect for

"Whispers of Rest"

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{I hate to voice my opinion here, but I've put off writing anything about this for some time, and although this Study is not the only one (3 of mine) that is this way, I guess I've had my fill of this, and want to speak out.

Many of these "Studies" take place in private (closed) groups on Facebook (which is great if you do Facebook and if you are a participant, because it protects your privacy somewhat). However, if you choose not to ... or have not succumbed to "joining" yet another social media site like Facebook, this 'tool' is excluding you from participating without having Facebook. I have stayed clear this far from completely being a Facebook member (?) but these type of groups are almost soliciting in a way to be part of Facebook, even though many speak about "shutting down" social media to spend time with God or family etc., this seems to be promoting being part of yet another social media. I will take this to PRAYER once again but I don't hear God calling me to Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. yet I do hear others inviting us in ... which is even more concern for me, to stay away and resist being a part. I am far from a saint but I firmly see this as following the popular crowd of society and I know that alot of good probably happens because of this however, I have a real check about this just like expecting "followers" on my blog ... clearly I could write much more and many of you might wish to "defend" or point out in a Christian way the good of this, yet I am not open to debate here and thus, am closing comments. This was not at all the purpose of this post and it now may seem like it is/was due to the length. My apologies to this Study and you, if you do FB}

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